The Gift

I wanna tell you a story about my mom because I think it’s important. 

She got sober in 1970. I started drinking four years later, when I was 14 and she was 50. 

I started blacking out when I was fifteen, the first time at a New Year’s Eve party at my friend’s mountain house. 
When I got home, I told my mom about it. She listened and loved me. “What do you need?”

I don’t remember what I said. I just remember feeling heard and loved. 
When I was 21 years old, I got engaged. A few weeks later, after another black out and too much drinking, he broke it off. 

When I got home, I told my mom about it. She listened and loved me. “What do you need?”

I don’t remember what I said. I just remember feeling heard and loved. 
When I was 30 and struggling, in my first marriage, wondering if this is all there is…I bought a pint of vodka, drank it after three years of not drinking. I started sleeping in the other bedroom and falling into a dark place. That marriage ended. 

When I came home, I told my mom about it. She listened and loved me. “What do you need?”

I don’t remember what I said. I just remember feeling heard and loved. 
When I was 32 and struggling to make ends meet. I was barely holding on and my health was stumbling. I went to a 12-step meeting. 

When I got home, I told my mom about it. She listened and loved me. “What do you need?”

I don’t remember what I said. I just remember feeling heard and loved. 

When I was 36 and showed up for my first Girls on the Run gathering at Charlotte Country Day School; I found something within myself that had always been there but was dimmed for a bit. 

When I came home, I told my mom about it. She listened and loved me. “What do you need?”

I don’t remember what I said. I just remember feeling heard and loved. 

What a gift to be loved and heard…no more or no less through it all. 

I think I’ve done that for my own kids and I marvel at the adults they are becoming; and marvel too at the power of unconditional love and am so grateful I know what it feels like to receive it.

(This photo was taken six months before she passed away ❤️💜💜💙)

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